a list of the books that have shaped who I am and will be, forever

persian

• The Enlightenment of The Greengage Tree by Shokoofeh Azar

  

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  Mystical, surreal storytelling. the first novel I've read that has taken this approach, and I doubt I'll ever read anything similar.
• Martyr! by Kaveh Akbar

  

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  Sort of predictable plot, nonetheless painful. Also very haunting writing, the breaks were fantastic. Satisfying ending.
• The Shahnameh by Ferdowsi

  
• The Cypress Tree by Kamin Mohammadi

  
• Persepolis by Marjane Satrapi

  
• The Blind Owl by Sadegh Hedayat

  
• Her Eyes by Bozorg Alavi

  

contemporary fiction

• Gathering Blue by Lois Lowry

  
• Messenger by Lois Lowry

  
• Son by Lois Lowry

  
• Go Set A Watchman by Harper Lee

  
• A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini

  

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  "One last time, Mariam did as she was told."
  
  The first book I cried reading and had to put down for a bit. If you're ever feeling ungrateful for the life you have, read this book. I found the plot of this book harsher and way more painful than The Kite Runner.
  
• The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini

  
• And the Mountains Echoed by Khaled Hosseini

  
• Piranesi by Susanna Clarke

  

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  My God this is one of the finest pieces of epistolary literature I have ever read.
  
  A friend recommended this book during a conversation about amnesia, and I couldn't have asked for a better representation. It captures the regaining of memory with remarkable grace. It literally frames forgetfulness as the birth of a new person.
  
  Read this by the shore, alone. And between The Tides and The Book, I came to understand that the Beauty of the House is immeasurable; its Kindness infinite.
  
  When worry finds me again, I hope I remember one thing: we are all the Beloved Children of the House.
  
  Be comforted.
  
• The Stranger by Albert Camus

  

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  This is a phenomenal piece of writing, but I couldn't help but grow incredibly frustrated with it. I initially hovered around giving it a 3 out of 5, but I recognize that had I read this at another point in my life, it could have been a 5. So I've settled on a 4.
  
  Spoilers ahead.
  
  There is no dispute that Camus writes extraordinarily well, nor is there any doubt that this is a horrifyingly powerful piece of literature. But that very power is exactly what makes it so agonizing to read. Meursault, as a protagonist, is just so damn tough to stomach. It certainly doesn't help that the entire narrative is trapped inside his perspective. Putting yourself in Marie or Maman or Perez's shoes quickly shows you how insufferable Meursault is.
  
  Maybe some people relate to him. Maybe, under different circumstances, I would have related, too. But right now, I simply cannot comprehend his indifference to everything. It disgusts me.
  
  Meursault is a character who is neither tethered to nor entirely detached from life. He is neither actively moving through it nor pausing to reflect. He simply lets life happen to him, offering minimal input. I just cannot respect it. It was agonizing to witness his complete lack of a moral compass. The entire sequence where he befriends Raymond almost made me tear my hair out. I just could not.
  
  Of course, I understand that Meursault is the ultimate absurdist. I know this visceral reaction is exactly what Camus wants his readers to feel. But I simply cannot accept his worldview; a part of me refuses to believe such people actually exist.
  
  I will say, however, that the ending is nice. The book begins facing death and ends facing death, but Meursault holds a profoundly different view by the conclusion. I love the irony that lashing out at the chaplain is exactly what triggers his radical acceptance of life, learning, much like Maman did, how to live fiercely and radically in the face of the inevitable.
  
  (By the way, I'm incredibly offended by how Meursault treats the sun. For those familiar with when I read this book, you know exactly why. Also lol, I love that Camus references Meursault in The Plague.)
  
  I could ramble about this novel for hours. Camus succeeded in provoking me, I guess. Ultimately, I agree with the prosecutor:
  
  "I ask you for this man's head, and I do so with a heart at ease."
  
• The Giver by Lois Lowry

  

classics

• To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee

  
• Animal Farm by George Orwell

  
• Frankenstein by Mary Shelley

  
• 1984 by George Orwell

  
• Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury

  

thriller

• Asylum by Madeleine Roux

  
• Sanctum by Madeleine Roux

  
• Catacomb by Madeleine Roux

  

math

• Surreal Numbers by Donald Knuth

  

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  Great for what it intends to do, see blog post. Could be clearer in some places, but I suppose you do have to remember that this was written by Knuth.
• A Mathematician's Lament by G. H. Hardy

  

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  This book is what got me to try teaching Mathematics for the first time. I've kept it close to heart since.

memoir

• Wave by Sonali Deraniyagala

  

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  Raw, gripping, brutally honest. I had to remind myself several times that this was a memoir--- it felt that surreal and painful. Visceral yet so formative.

novella

• Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes

  

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  wish this was longer. for all other purposes, 5 stars.
• The Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka

  

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  "For the moment, though, I'd better get up, since my train goes at five."
  

non-fiction

• The Persians by Gene R. Garthwaite

  

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  Terse. Did what it was supposed to, but terse.
• All The Shah's Men by Stephen Kinzer

  

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  ouch.